Wednesday, January 12, 2005

I am in the middle of a long tunnel. That tunnel is this week.

Okay, that’s probably too dramatic, but this is a very tiring week and it’s only going to get more tiring. I’ve been out every night this week—Monday and Tuesday all night at writing groups—and I’ll be out every other night. Thursday night, I’m going to happy hour after work, then helping my parents move a dresser. Friday night, I’ll be having dinner with my aunt and her son who are coming down for the weekend, after which I’ll spend the night at Redemption. Saturday morning I have breakfast and spend the morning with the same relatives, then it’s off to the weekly animation meeting, then I host Guy’s Night Out.

Sunday, I have church, then I really need to finish proofing that novel so I can get it off my chest.

I’m not complaining; I’ll enjoy it all. It’s just more than I can honestly handle in one week without exhausting myself. I know that I’ll be irritable by Sunday. I want to avoid exhausting myself, but then…what should I cut out?

Meanwhile, work has been an unexpected joy. I’ve been in training all week, but it’s training with a bunch of fun people who all want to learn and teach. That’s made all the difference; I’m learning a lot and connecting with people a little bit. That’s why I want to go to happy hour Thursday night.

Unfortunately, I’ve come home exhausted and mentally unable to perform my 9:00 routine (write fiction, review Japanese, write a journal entry, and read). I’ve wanted to, but I either return home at 11:00 or I don’t have the energy.

Though to be honest, I wonder if I’m not just fooling myself there. What if I just went ahead and wrote anyway?

On the gripping hand, I suspect that I’m mistrusting my own judgment. I probably am too tired to do those things, and if I tried, I’d tire myself further and make insignificant progress.

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