10 Mar 08

It’s been a weird seven days since my last post. Lots of things going on that I don’t want to talk about here, because…well, why not? I don’t want the wrong people to find out. I can’t think of a single “wrong person.”

I’m thinking of leaving my current full-time job at Rockwell Collins STS. Planning to, actually, some time in April. Mainly because I’m bored to tears with my current responsibilities, and our division isn’t winning new contracts, and several coworkers are increasingly hard to work with.

It’s evolved into more than that. I want to make it on my own. I want to try freelancing, taking on part-time programming work and copyediting jobs and tutoring. I want to live by my wits and my ability to hunt work.

The idea excites me, far more than going in to work every morning and sitting in the same chair for eight hours. It enlivens me, literally.

All sorts of reasons not to, of course. And it’s amazing how many people will counsel you against something like this. Like it’s an affront to their own desperate need for a false sense of security. I keep reminding myself of all the reasons to take the leap. I want to feel that electric sensation of being alive, of seeing things with clarity, of not having to feel grey all day.

I watched a bit of Office Space today, and I started identifying with Peter. Something’s wrong.