Hitting the “Pause” Button on Giant Armors

May 18 2009

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Those of you familiar with my Giant Armors project may wonder how it’s going.

It isn’t.

I’ve been stuck for months. Not with writer’s block, exactly. I’ve known what needs to be done, I’ve just had no creative juice for it.

It’s weird. I know how to sit down and work at writing. I know how to burrow my way out of landslides of doubt and dead ends.

This feels different. I feel like I’ve outgrown the idea.

We’ve all done this. We come across an idea we had years ago for some project, and we wonder why we ever wanted to do it. It just seems so…wrong for us now.

I don’t know if Giant Armors is wrong for me yet. It feels like an idea half-formed, that needs more gestation. Perhaps I started too early. Perhaps I haven’t given it enough attention. However, whenever I give it attention, nothing usable comes.

So, I’m setting it aside. Like a favorite outfit that’s out of season, Giant Armors is going in mothballs for a while. I’m giving it about six months before I’ll force myself to revisit it.

I just…it frustrates me. I want to be able to slam through whatever problem I have. Win by persistence and dedication. All that great samurai stuff.

Do I need more dedication? I don’t know. I just don’t know.

I do know the danger of having too many projects going at once. And while I’m now clearing this from my plate (for now), is that just another way for me to do more stuff? Is this just the easier path?

I don’t know. I can’t process it logically, I can’t feel what’s right, and my gut isn’t leading me in any direction.

So, I’ll simplify. And look at it again once I’ve rested.

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